Upset. Very.

I'm still alive. But perhaps not for long. For I'm drowning in the neverending pile of work. Often, I can't help but feel demoralized. It's not that I don't even try. It's just that I keep trying but I am constantly failing.

And home is just not a conducive place to study...

My sister is back from her working trip. That's the only happy thing which happened these few days. But I'm grateful for that. Thankfully, her flight is not delayed by the Icelandic volcanic eruption. My sister has been spoiling me rotten by buying presents for me every week =x I feel really bad to have her splurge on me. But I think it's her way of rooting for me and cheer me up during this tough period, and I really appreciate her thoughts.

---------

I guess it's the time of the month again. It's when you get very upset over the slightest things, when you get emotional over almost nothing and when you can't help being unreasonable. But it is also the time when you wish to have a little more attention and understanding from the people around you. That, I don't think I'm getting any.

Maybe if I die suddenly today, no one will find out until weeks later.

I thought I matter to you but it's just my wishful thinking. Sometimes I think too highly of myself.

I have so much more to say but I don't think I should go on. How I wish I can hide somewhere where no one can find me.